MMD BLOG


CATEGORY:

CENTERED LIFE + MAMA WELLNESS

YOU GET TO CHOOSE: TAKING CONTROL OF YOUR LIFE

 Modern Mommy Doc


PUBLICATION DATE:

December 27, 2021

YOU GET TO CHOOSE: TAKING CONTROL OF YOUR LIFE

 Modern Mommy Doc

CATEGORY: CENTERED LIFE + MAMA WELLNESS

When every day feels like it’s on repeat.

When you feel like nothing you do is making a difference in your future.

When you have so many freaking things going on in your life that you wake up dreaming about going back to sleep that night.


Every single human being on the planet faces a million different kinds of stressors. From childhood to adulthood, they’re there. And they range from small inconveniences to something that will knock you off your feet. But the fact remains that we ALL experience hardships and seasons that feel a lot trickier to navigate than others. Or seasons that feel a lot harder for us than for those we see around us.


The science remains pretty clear on this one for us: the #1 way to fight trauma, stress, and ACEs (Adverse Childhood Experiences) is resilience. For kids, learning resilience is one of the most important determinants of social-economic and overall health. And the fastest way to build it? 


Control.


Not in a “I’m type A and have to be in control of things at all times” kind of way. But in a way that empowers children of all circumstances and backgrounds with agency over their situation. We’ve seen in maternal and child public health studies that show CLEARLY that ACEs can bring about more ACEs when put within a family context, but that resilience and empowerment are also contagious with families.


Yep, terrible, no good, no fair things happen. But choosing to model resilience to your kids strengthens and changes families for the better.


That’s why we talk SO much about 
The Centered Life here at Modern Mommy Doc.  No matter what our background or economic level, we can define a vision for our lives as working parents that’s in alignment with our goals and priorities. Then, even when life gets messy and circumstances, systems, or people get in the way and hold us back, that centered vision acts as a North Star to come back to time and time again. 


It’s a goal-oriented framework to remind us of what’s most important to us in the long-term, even if resources and circumstances hold us back from fully realizing it in the immediate future. With this mindset, you’ll focuses on capitalizing on and leaning into what you can control, even in a world filled with discrimination, racism, inequities, and injustice. 


And with all of the talk of new goals as the last year ends and the new year begins in just a few days, this is a perfect time to start this practice. Your resolutions don’t have to be about your body or your money. One about your mindset is just as (if not more!) important.


When you decide to take control over your life in all areas, it doesn’t just become about home and work life. YOU get to decide what it looks like. What the You Life feels like. What you allow it to include. And what to decide to keep out.


Taking control of your life isn’t about who has the hardest life or who hurts the most, it’s about clearly defining what you want from your life and shaping your life around that.


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About the Episode: In this eye-opening episode of the Modern Mommy Doc podcast, Dr. Whitney Casares sits down with child sleep experts Dr. Andrea Roth and Dr. Allison Shale—two clinical psychologists and co-authors of The Essential Guide to Children’s Sleep: A Tired Caregiver’s Workbook for Every Age and Stage (written with Dr. Shelby Harris) . Together, they break down the myths, shame, and unrealistic expectations that surround slee p training and offer compassionate, evidence-based advice that actually meets parents where they are. This episode is your permission slip to stop blaming yourself, throw out the cookie-cutter advice, and start working with your child’s unique temperament, challenges, and developmental stage—whether that means defiant toddlers, anxious middle-schoolers, or non-sleeping newborns. About Our Guests: Dr. Andrea Roth and Dr. Allison Shale are licensed clinical psychologists and moms who specialize in child and adolescent mental health. Together with co-author Dr. Shelby Harris, they created The Essential Guide to Children’s Sleep to give exhausted parents the tools to support their kids’ sleep with confidence, flexibility, and empathy. Their approach is grounded in science—and shaped by real-life parenting. Follow them on Instagram: @essentialkidssleep Key Takeaways: Why this sleep book is different It’s written by clinical psychologists, not influencers—and it combines science, flexibility, and real-world parenting experience. How your child’s daytime behavior impacts nighttime sleep From anxious kids to defiant or ADHD children, the team explains why your child’s personality and emotional regulation during the day matters more than you think at bedtime. The truth about sleep “milestones” You’ll learn why your two-week-old shouldn’t be sleeping through the night, why “wake windows” are often misused, and why transitioning to a toddler bed before age 3 might be setting everyone up to fail. The importance of timing and readiness Parents don’t have to sleep train when they’re already overwhelmed. These experts offer a refreshing take on how to assess if now is the right time—and how to set up for success. What works for toddlers (and what doesn’t) You’ll hear how techniques like the “break method” and “camping out” can be adapted based on your child’s age and developmental stage. How to support anxious or defiant older kids at bedtime The language we use matters. For anxious kids, it's all about reducing pressure and focusing on rest. For defiant or ADHD kids, clear expectations and behavior-based plans are key. The shame-free approach every tired caregiver needs Sleep doesn’t have to be a battleground—or a place for guilt. These authors bring compassion and practicality to every step of the process. 📩 Subscribe to The Modern Mommy Doc Podcast for more episodes on parenting with confidence and clarity. L eave a review using the hashtag #ModernMommyDoc.
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