Have you ever had to take a work phone call when you were at home? They always come at the WORST time. Kids playing (loudly) in the background. Dinner’s boiling over on the stove. Someone’s knocking at the door. And someone’s crying. Someone’s always crying.
But you take a deep breath, tap that button, and answer, “This is Dr. Whitney” as if nothing else is going on. All while waving your arms and snapping your fingers to get your kids’ attention and giving your best “everybody be quiet or mommy is going to lose her ish when she gets off the phone!” look to your family.
Because how dare your kids play in their own home, right?
Whyyyyy do we do this to ourselves? And our kids?
THERE’S THIS WEIRD PRESSURE THAT FEELS LIKE YOU CAN’T LET ANYONE IN YOUR WORK BUBBLE KNOW THAT THERE’S EVEN THIS OTHER SIDE TO YOU THAT EXISTS. THEN THEY MIGHT KNOW THAT YOU’RE (GASP) A HUMAN WHO CAN’T TAKE ON EVERYTHING THAT’S ASKED OF HER ALL THE FREAKING TIME WITHOUT A BOUNDARY IN SIGHT.
Same thing on the flip side, right? At home, we take on room mom duties, team mom duties, and set up the most elaborate bedtime routines that must be done every night or else no one sleeps--as if we don’t have any other commitments 40+ hours a week.
When we work and parent like this, everyone loses. We aren’t giving our best to our kids. And we aren’t giving our best to our jobs.
When we believe that we have to work like we aren’t a parent and parent like we don’t work, we’re living a life that is haphazard and draining. For everyone.
The idea that we have to live these two compartmentalized lives is a lie that a lot of working moms are believing today (and is actually encouraged by a ton of employers, which only makes it worse.)
The truth is, you CAN have a life that’s prioritized, aligned, and centered. It IS possible.
But first, you have to develop a framework and this North Star to always point back to. What’s guiding your decisions about work? What are your priorities for your home?
Knowing and naming these allows you to show up as your full self at work AND at home. It also guides you to know when and where it's right for YOU to place more time, energy, and focus toward all the competing areas of your life. So the choice is yours to make, rather than having it made for you.
This is the whole idea behind the
Modern Mamas Club. We are a safe, supportive space for like-minded Modern Mamas who dream of having it all, to actually succeed in that dream and lift up other Mamas to do the same. It IS possible to thrive, not just survive in your work life, parent life and YOU life, but you’ve gotta take action.
Come join us over in the
Modern Mamas Club (all the cool kids are doing it.) We’ve got an AMAZING community of mamas to support you, a huge video library, live events, monthly challenges, journaling downloads, and about a thousand other things. If you’re ready to live that centered life, come hang with us. Plus, right now, you can even get your first month free!
I know first-hand that working mom life is hard, but I also know it doesn’t have to be impossible.
Trust me. The best way to get unstuck isn’t to work harder. It’s to use a framework that gets real results, no matter what area you need to tackle first.